Yesterday I had an interesting experience. I use the word interesting because I have not yet labelled this situation and I am not sure where the hell to box it, to be honest. What I do know with total conviction is my firm position and where I stand on the topic of our lady function/s and how we have been conditioned to not talk about, mention or even insinuate that it could be that time of the month for us and that we are bleeding from our VAGINA’S!!!!!!
Ok, so yesterday we had a birthday to attend, a pool party to be exact. My kiddies were major excited getting into their swimmers in the morning as the three of us are hectic creatures of the water. We love the pool, beach, lake, and pretty much consider any body of water an open invitation to get amongst it, we even got in a swamp once. No joke.
A family member had asked for a lift to the party, so we headed out to their place to pick them up. As we waited for them to get ready, said family member came out to the living room and asked me if I was going to get changed into my swimmers as it was getting close to paaaaaarty time. My little girl overheard the conversation and answered her before I even got the chance to open my mouth.
‘She is not swimming; she has her period’. I am pretty sure the family member that had asked me the question nearly had their eyes fall out of their head in shock with my girl's comments. She responded to my little one by saying something along the lines of ‘we don't say that, it's rude to say that, and that is personal, we should never talk about that’.
It was at this point I felt the need to enter the crimson conversation that was occurring in front of me and about me, even though I had not yet even spoken a word.
‘hold up!’ I said somewhat bluntly, unintentionally mind you, as it had hit a nerve without me even realising. I made it very clear to them that my children and I speak openly about the ins and outs of our bodies and are entirely matter of fact about female and male body function and how things work and what this means for day to day living in the human form.
Suffice to say they didn't agree.
Now, I understand that there are going to be generational differences that dictate how we do life and how open, or closed, we are about things like menstruation and our sexual organs. But come on!!! We are not living in 1950 anymore, and I certainly don't feel the need to hide the fact that I am going through ‘that time of the month’ right now or wearing ‘the red badge of courage’. I’m also not going to lie about it either; I teach my kids the importance of honesty every day. I have nothing to be ashamed about, why wouldn't I be straight up about why I am not swimming? To be clear, I don't have beef with tampons either BTW I just don't feel like swimming and splashing around when it feels like I have to two porcupines for ovaries!
The whole idea that we need to cover up, hide or camouflage the fact that we are menstruating is completely absurd and ridiculous to me. Hell, I couldn't even hide it if I wanted to. When aunty Flo visits I turn into a completely different person. My breasts become oversized watermelons as painful as they are heavy, when I open the fridge door I act like I've been lost at sea rationing my food for months! Miss wild heart's stunt double kicks me out, steps in and takes over, she has her own agenda and is a total walking contradiction in that, she is horny as hell, but any male dare touch her they risk getting TKO'd. Also, depending on how bad my Adenomyosis and Endometriosis is going, I occasionally rock the ‘six months pregnant’ look, which can be sexy as fuck, but not when fertility is the last thing on my ‘to do’ list.
We have been conditioned for so long to believe and act as though our NORMAL and NATURAL womanly body functions are not to be seen, heard or discussed, but why???? There is nothing ‘rude’ about menstruating!!!! For the love of god, is it rude to pee or take a shit? I also take no issue with folks that choose to be conservative about their functions either. Each to their own.
When it comes to my kids though, I will not be left seeing red; they will both grow up knowing that menstruating and other body functions are as healthy as breathing. I want my girl to know that she need not feel ‘weird’ about the fact that she bleeds once a month and that it is a completely normal part of life. I equally want my son to know what we go through so that he can be understanding and knowledgeable on the matter of ‘lady business’ and support the women in his life. Equally, if I am out with male friends for dinner and don't feel like a heavy meal, I don't tell stories, I simply drop the whole 'no thanks, I am feeling bloated and hormonal.' They get it, no questions asked.
Now, in case any of you are nervous that I might be inspired to run a marathon while on my period and not wear any pad with sweet cherry juice running down my legs (like that lady did at the London Marathon) fear not! I am not rooting for a cause here, merely doing my bit to break the stigma by teaching my kids all about life, our bodies and our right to live openly.
Ps: don't even get me started on farting!
I am all woman and bleed proudly!